A Second Chance. Harshad & Mukti

-- ONE --

“Mukti!” Aliya’s urgent voice rang out from her cell phone. “Can you babysit Sammy for a few days? Dhruv’s dad has taken ill suddenly and we have to rush to Delhi…”

“Calm down, Aliya,” Mukti cut short Aliya’s agitated voice, calmly. “First take a deep breath, and then tell me properly.”

“We have to rush to Delhi … I don’t want to take Sammy as we may be in and out of hospital … and I also don’t want him to see his dada connected to pipes and machines!!!” Aliya all but wailed, ignoring Mukti’s suggestion to remain calm. “He’s started school, so you really won't have him coming in your way … and the servants are there … I just need an adult presence in the house…”

“Relax … relax, Aliya,” Mukti again tried to calm, her best friend down, “I’ve done this before remember, the last time Dhruv and you needed a break alone? You don’t have to give me reasons to come and spend time with my favourite nephew … heck my only nephew actually! Just tell me when you are are leaving, I’ll move in, don’t worry.”

“Thanks Mukti!” Aliya breathed a sigh of relief, “we’ve actually taking the afternoon flight,” she admitted apologetically. “We got a call this morning only, so I could not inform you sooner …”

“No problems,” Mukti once again cut through her friends apologies, “I just need to grab my stuff and take a cab, what’s so difficult about that. Don’t worry, I’ll be there in a couple of hours, cool?”

“Yes, thanks again,” Aliya gushed, “I’ll go pack and stuff, Dhruv is looking into the tickets so we’ll not have much time … get here as soon as you can … oh and by the way Sammy is real excited to have you here,” Aliya added, rolling her eyes, remembering his excitement to have his ‘cool’ maasi coming to spend the night with him!

“Ha ha … tell him maasi and he are going to have loads of fun,” Mukti promised, also looking forward to spending time with the little chatterbox. “Now let me go get myself organized to move in … see you in a bit.”

By late afternoon, Mukti had settled into one of the guest rooms in the spacious bungalow Dhruv and Aliya owned in one of Mumbai’s suburbs. Sameer had come back from school and they had shared a fun filled lunch together on the swing in the garden outside. She had played a little bit of cricket with him and now he was tucked into bed, taking his afternoon nap, while Mukti remained in the garden reading her book comfortably.

Engrossed in her book, enjoying the silence of the beautiful lawns surrounding the house, she did not notice a luxury car draw up into the driveway. Nor the slamming of a door that followed. It was only when the doorbell chimed that she realized that they had visitors.

The bell pealed again in quick succession, as the person outside impatiently kept pressing it again and again. The staff would probably be in their quarters for the afternoon, Mukti realized. Keeping her book down on the swing forcefully, she got up mumbling, “I’m coming … I’m coming…” wishing whoever it was would remove their hand from the bell. Sameer would wake up with the noise!

She rushed inside to open the door, an irritated look on her face, ready to give whoever it was a piece of her mind and stopped short when she saw Harshad Saxena in person standing on the landing, a similar irritated look on his face, hand poised up towards the doorbell, about to ring it again.

“YOU?” they both said in unison as they faced each other after nearly 10 years.

Standing at the door in a state of shock, Mukti took in his polished black brogues and immaculate steel grey trousers that hugged his lean hips and waist where a pristine white shirt was tucked in, showing not an inch of excess fat. His sleeves were rolled up to reveal his strong arms and the shirt unbuttoned at the collar exposing a bit of his chest. Her eyes travelled up to his face and she stepped back in surprise to see the cold look in his eyes, where there had always been a mischievous, even evil glint. He gave her a freezing look, an eyebrow raised questioningly at her ‘checking him out’ from top to toe. She looked away embarrassed, her hand still holding the door.

“What are you doing here?” she asked rudely instead, trying to recall if Aliya had mentioned anything about his arrival before leaving, sure she would not have forgotten such a thing.

“This is still my sister’s home, isn’t it?” Harshad asked her sarcastically, now looking pointedly at her hand that held the door open, but was barring his entry.

“They are not here,” Mukti stood her ground, not wishing to have anything to do with him, let alone allow him into the house with her alone there.

Harshad stared at Mukti equally shocked to unexpectedly come face-to-face with her. There was so much he needed to say to her, and had repeatedly requested Aliya for her number. But now when she was standing in front of him, he was completely at a loss of words. She looked all grown up and most unlike the hellion he had walked away from years ago. She was still slim and tall but with her curly mop of hair casually knotted at her nape, and her paisley printed tunic teamed with classic denims, she looked older and more mature. But other than that, there was a serenity that was emanating from her, one that he could not look away from. A peaceful glow surrounded her, and even though she was speaking rudely to him, he could not find an iota of malice or bitterness in her words. And she had all the right to be bitter, he thought harshly remembering his past actions.

“Can I come in,” he requested her instead. “I can wait for them.”

Mukti stood for a minute just staring at him, unable to decide what to do. She could not stop him. After all he was right, this was his sisters house and he had every right to be here. She bit her lip as she made up her mind, and removing her hand moved aside to let him enter.

He walked past her without another glance or word and she watched him open the door of one of the ground floor guest rooms confidently and walk in, but not before gesturing to his driver to get the luggage.

LUGGAGE! Mukti paled as she saw a suitcase being carried into the room, where Harshad had just disappeared. He was going to stay here! Did Aliya know this?

The slam of the door startled her and she stood there unmoving, just staring at the closed door in horror for a minute before going upstairs to her own room, that was adjoining Sameers room. She peeped, quietly into his room, to see him still fast asleep and shut the door of her room to stay there and resume her reading.

Which was easier said than done, as questions raged through her mind. This was going to be a tough one. How long was he going to be here? Dhruv and Aliya would not have reached home as yet, so there was no point in calling them to ask what was going on. And what was wrong with Harshad? His eyes had been so cold and dead as if he were not even human. There had been not a flicker of emotion in those eyes, as she had exchanged those few words to him.

So much for pestering Aliya for my number, Mukti mused, aware that he had been asking his sister about her. Aliya had mentioned it to her once or twice. Well she had been in front of him a short while ago, and he had not uttered one word of regret or even looked remotely upset about anything. But something about him had not been right, Mukti put her book down and leaning against the headboard, closed her eyes as she tried to think of what it was about him that was irking her.

--  TWO --

By evening she had a hyper Sameer in her hands, who refused to go to the park till he had met his mamu. She watched him gulp his glass of milk and pester her to go down to Harshad’s room. Mukti was not sure if Harshad would welcome the disturbance, but seeing no way out, and deciding that this was his nephew after all … he better take out the time for him! sent Sameer down with his ‘didi’. She herself changed into comfortable walking shoes so that she could accompany him to the park. The walk outside would do her some good, she thought. How long was she going to stay cooped up in this room?

As she stepped out of her room, she heard loud squeals of joy coming from the room downstairs, and smiled in relief that Harshad had not shouted or sent Sameer away as she had feared. The child was obviously having a good time with his uncle, going by the shouts of joy. She heard Harshad murmur something to him, through the slightly open door, and watched Sameer bounding out, all ready to go to the park with her.

“He has a meeting with someone, so has ‘homework’ to do.” Sameer informed her importantly, as she held his hand and they walked out towards the neighbourhood park. She smiled and asked the appropriate questions about the gifts his uncle had brought as he prattled on about it.

So Harshad was here for work. She had managed to speak with Aliya earlier and came to know that it was a sudden trip that even Aliya was not aware of. Mukti had reassured Aliya that she would be ok sharing the house with him, as Aliya repeatedly asked her about it. “He’s not very chatty or social, from what I can make out,” she had informed Aliya. “I think we will manage to stay out of each other’s way perfectly ok.”

And that was exactly how it happened. Two days passed without any interaction between them. With Sameers routine, and her own visits to the children’s wing at the cancer hospital, it remained peaceful. It was as if Harshad was not even in the house. He would keep to his room and be out most of the meal times, and most of the evenings too.

It was finally over the weekend, that Mukti was roused from an afternoon nap, by squeals of laughter coming from outside. She smiled as Sameer shouted something, and got out of bed to open the door to her balcony overlooking the back lawns. She watched in awe, Harshad at one end of the lawns, ball in hand running up a short distance to bowl to Sameer, who stood with his bat at the other end. He had roped in the driver and a couple of other staff to field and was obviously enjoying the antics of his uncle, who was pretending to come at him with a super fast ball.

She looked closely at Harshad, after three days. The last was when she had opened the door for him. After that, she only heard his voice whenever he spoke with Sameer. Dressed casually in faded denims and a pastel pink collared t-shirt, he looked fit and slimmer than she remembered him. Though his arms were still muscular, his slim waist and hips did complete justice to the pair of denims that fit snugly on his tall frame. And he was laughing, she noted with surprise. The deep husky sound of his laugh sounded alien to her. As if she was hearing him laugh genuinely for the first time in her life.

Her cellphone rang inside rousing her from her reverie and she left them to go inside to attend to it. It was Aliya, giving her the update on Dhruv’s dad and also inquiring about how Mukti was coping. She had just finished assuring her friend that all was ok, and had disconnect the phone when a cry from downstairs startled her. Throwing her phone on the bed, Mukti rushed once again to the balcony only to see Harshad rush into the house with Sameer in his arms, and screaming her name repeatedly!

Oh God! Mukti went cold, as she wondered what could have happened to Sameer. Rushing out of her room she ran into the verandah coming to a standstill when she saw Sameer sitting on one of the garden chairs crying, and Harshad kneeling in front of him, instructing the driver to fetch her from upstairs.

“What happened?” She knelt beside Harshad as she took in his pale stressed look and Sameer’s grazed knee that had a smattering of blood and grass on it.

“He tripped while taking a run … there’s blood … look …. we need to take him to the hospital … doctor ko bulaya?” the last question he threw at one of the staff that was hovering around them. Mukti was sure she saw an amused look in his eyes, before he nodded and ran inside to phone the family doctor.

“Mukti!” She turned back as he said her name impatiently, “Do something…”

Sameer was screaming the place down and Harshad was no better, Mukti realized. It was just a slight graze, the usual that little boys suffer while playing, and Harshad was just cracking up as if Sameer had broken his foot or something!

Rolling her eyes at him, she turned towards Sameer first, trying to calm him down. She reached up and held him close to her, his sobbing body clutching at her, and murmured reassuring words about how brave he was, and how like a real cricketer he had gotten an injury. She looked towards Harshad who was staring at her, his mouth open in amazement, “ask didi to get the first aid box, he will be ok.” she instructed him and turned back to console Sameer, who had now stopped screaming and looking down at his grazed knee curiously.

“He needs a doctor … we need to go to the hospital,” Harshad informed her coldly, his mask falling back in place, she noticed. “You can’t…”

“It’s just a graze, Harshad,” she told him impatiently, “didn't you get them playing games as a boy? We’ll just clean it up, and he will be as good as new ... no, Champ?” she looked down and asked Sameer.

“You can’t take this lightly …” Harshad started to say only to be given a glare by her, indicating that she needed the first aid box.

Seeing the final look in her eyes, and a quiet Sameer cuddled into her lap now, Harshad pushed himself off the floor and went inside to locate the first air box as instructed. He would still call the doctor, whatever she said, he mumbled to himself. There was blood on Sammy’s knee, maybe he would need stitches … Harshad paled at the thought. But first he should get that damn box and let her do whatever she thought was necessary.

With Sameer’s knee cleaned and bandaged, Mukti then instructed for a milkshake to cheer him up and a session of watching TV instead of the park, which Sameer readily agreed to.

“Can mamu watch with us,” he asked her innocently when she picked him up and started moving inside.

Mukti looked towards Harshad over Sameer’s head and was taken aback by his blank look. She cleared her throat audibly and watched him notice them with a start and nod finally towards Sameer. I suppose, it being the weekend he had no meetings fixed, Mukti wondered as they walked into the living room and she settled Sameer on the couch, elevating his leg with a cushion to make him feel important! She was surprised when she saw Harshad come and sit on Sameer’s side and surf the channels for him to choose from. Was he only comfortable speaking with Sameer, Mukti frowned as she noticed the visible change in him. It was like a transformation happening before her eyes. The cold, emotionless look being replace with tenderness whenever Sameer was spoken to. She sat down on the other side of the little boy and rested her on the backrest and relaxed as uncle and nephew bonded over some silly cartoon.

She must have dozed off she realised, as she felt Sameer pull at her arm, “maaasi…” he wailed obviously irritated at her not paying attention to him anymore. “get up, na …. mamu is taking us to McDonalds for dinner…. Maaasiiiii”

“Haan baba … I’m up,” she sat up with a jerk, taking in their expectant faces looking at her. Go out for dinner with them! How was she supposed to get out of this one, now without upsetting Sameer, she wondered.

Harshad watched the drowsiness in her khol-rimmed eyes get replaced by the confusion. He bit back a rare smile at seeing the ‘always in control Mukti’ fumbling for words. He had been watching her sleep for the past twenty minutes now, as Sameer had become engrossed in the cartoon. Her thick dark lashes had been concealing the big doe-shaped eyes he remembered so well. Eyes that he had seen filled with passion, sorrow, angst and finally anger and disgust.  He naturally curly and usually unruly hair had escaped its ponytail to curl around her smooth jaw line in soft tendrils. Her dewy pink lips had parted slightly in sleep and he pulled in a ragged breath at where his thoughts were heading. No! He had no time or inclination for this kind of stuff anymore. So much had happened in these past years. College seemed like a dream that did not even exist anymore. Except that it did. His actions did exist. Came back to haunt him regularly. And it was one of the reasons that he had finally made this trip back home, in the pretext of business, to face his past and be done with it. More than anything else, he knew he needed the closure. Needed to speak with her to say his bit.

She had been curled up on the couch, her long denim clad legs folded under her. He noticed a silver anklet on one of her slim ankles, and fought back the impulse to reach out and touch it. OK! Stop! he clenched his hand into a tight fist.

“Ok, chalo,” her sudden outburst shook him out of his errant thoughts. “Lets get you changed and we can leave,” she told Sameer, but looked at Harshad for his approval. He nodded, and watched her get up in one smooth motion and pick up Sameer to take him to his room. Maybe he would after all get that chance to speak with her today, he sighed, as he went into his own room to collect his wallet and the car keys.

--  THREE  --

McDonalds on a Saturday evening! This had to be the most idiotic idea, Mukti rolled her eyes as they barely managed to find a small empty table for themselves. She had to literally shout her order out to Harshad over the din of the families surrounding them.

She sat with Sameer and waited while Harshad went off to place their order. Suddenly realizing that she forgot to tell him that she wanted a coffee too, she tried to look out for him so that she could gesture her requirement. Leaving the table was out of question, she realized as it would take them ages to find another vacant one, given the crowd. She spied one of the staff members walking past and requested him if he could please let the gentleman in the pink tee at the counter know she wanted a coffee along with their order.

Harshad had reached the counter sooner than he had expected, seeing the long line he had ahead of him. He felt a movement beside him, and turned to see one of the staff members speaking to him about his ‘wife’ requesting a coffee. Harshad raised an eyebrow in question, thinking that the man was probably confused what with the rush and noise. “Wife?” he questioned only to see the man point towards their table and repeat his request, “er … ma'am said to tell you she wanted a coffee too.”

“She’s not my…” Harshad started explaining automatically and stopped himself. Why was he giving explanations to the restaurant staff, for god sakes! Though, he felt a tiny warmth burst inside him at the mention of Mukti as his wife. He looked over at where she sat, playing a finger game with Sameer who sat laughing on the other chair. The gush of emotion that he suddenly felt alarmed him and he quickly looked away, repeating his order to the young girl behind the counter and including the coffee. No point in wishing for something that was not happening … he had too much emotional baggage, like once she did, he supposed. There was no way in hell he could handle another relationship in his life. He stole another fleeting glance at her, unaware of the longing that was suddenly visible in his usually hooded expression.

The drive back home was a quiet one as the events of the day had fatigued Sameer and soon he was fast asleep in the back seat. After a couple of minutes of silence, Harshad cleared his throat and wondered how to begin speaking with her. He was amazed at how nervous he felt. Heck, he was amazed that he had felt anything at all anymore.

“I’ve been trying to contact you for some time now,” he started quietly as he watched her turn away from the window to look at him.

“Aliya told me,” she replied calmly, waiting for him to continue.

“Er … yeah … she didn’t give me your number, though,” he defended his sister, incase she thought that Aliya had shared anything with him.

“I know,” Mukti smiled, enjoying his fumbling somewhat. Mr big businessman was at a loss of words now, it seemed.

“I wanted to speak with you … at that time I just left …” he swallowed and pulled in a breath and began again in a firmer voice. “I wanted to apologize for  what happened. Specifically what all I did when we were in a relationship.” There he had said it. And it sounded bloody lame now, he grimaced. “What I mean is that … you were the most important … the only girl I ever really cared for, and I went and screwed that up big time.”

Mukti continued to stare at him, a part of her feeling a sorry for him too. He had been carrying this guilt for so long, it seemed to be eating him up alive. “Harshad…” she began only to be stopped by his “no let me finish”.

“I’m not trying to justify my actions … no … I think I just completely lost it in the end … the zeal to break you guys up … the revenge … the plotting and scheming … somewhere I just lost track of what I was doing … Till Aliya shook me up by telling me that she didn’t want me to be her brother at all … that she was ashamed to be associated with me…”

“Yes, she went through hell too … alone,” Mukti murmured accusingly, remembering those days herself with some grief.

When he did remained silent, Mukti turned back towards the window for the rest of the journey, lost in her own thoughts about the past. Thinking about the past was something she did not do anymore. His little speech had managed to rake up some of the repressed emotions that she thought she had long sorted out.

Suddenly she wanted to be in her room with her diary … ‘speaking’ to Abhi. He was her anchor … writing that diary gave her a sense of peace. She was not one to think or rue the past anymore, but today Harshad had managed to make her recall those times again. Yes … she had to get back to Abhi as soon as possible.

--  FOUR --

Mukti switched on her bedside lamp and peered at the clock. It was well past midnight and she had been tossing and turning for the last few hours as sleep was just evading her. Even her spending half an hour writing in her diary had not helped to get the thoughts that Harshad’s apology had brought up, out of her head. Maybe she could get herself a hot glass of milk to calm herself, before a headache also came next, she decided.

Getting out of bed she had just opened the door to her room when she heard a loud hoarse shout coming from Harshad’s room. She froze at the door hearing the panic and terror in his voice. He seemed to be shouting out to someone to hold on. When the shouts just got worse, she rushed down the stairs and knocked tentatively on the door not really expecting an answer as the shouts were getting louder and more frantic. Hoping that he had not locked his door, she tried the handle and breathed a sigh of relief when it turned easily and she walked into the dark room. Adjusting her vision to the darkness, she looked towards the bed to see him suddenly sit up, and shout out a name as if he was in agony … as if someone was dying in front of him.

Instinctively Mukti rushed to the bed and sat at the edge, reaching out to hold him. His t-shirt was drenched in sweat, she noticed as she put her arms around him and patted his back, murmuring soothing words. She felt the tremors shaking him. He had stopped screaming at least, she saw, as she felt him clutching on to her as if someone was snatching her away and all he could do was hold on to her to keep her with him. He had been having a nightmare, but it was so real … she could feel the fear and trauma in his body and voice. What was happening? His tight grip on her slim frame,. was beginning to hurt her, but she continued to ignore her own discomfort and soothe his nerves.

They sat like for a while, till Harshad slowly came awake and found himself in Mukti’s arms, her soft breath fanning his nape as she whispered calming words to him. Her hands were holding him to herself, and one was gently stroking his back. He realized with a start that he was gripping her so tightly against him. Oh God! he groaned to himself, not again! This nightmare … and today of all days … Usually he just thrashed around the bed and awake in a pool of his own sweat, after which there was no going back to sleep … he would usually get up and switch on his laptop to work and get his mind of the nightmare. But today, her soothing soft presence was lulling him back into a relaxed stupor. Slowly he loosened his vice like grip on her and felt her stiffen and go silent.